“I do not seek to replace you”
The promises to be friends, I suppose those promises were made before knowing how difficult they would be to keep. Yes, I do miss you, and no I do not seek to replace you. My relationship with you pushed too far all the normal boundries and now I am afraid I cannot began a relationship with another man because he will fail in my mind before he ever begins. You gave me far too muich and now I cannot even bring myself to try to replace the emptyness you have left.My attempts to do so are reduced to a sadistic practice, knowing whatever the man who wants me see in my face doesn’t exsist anywhere inside of me. Fragile beauty, unable to care.or breath. I find myself sitting in dives, watching people around me, wondering at their lives. I listen to them so drunk they can barely stand tell me about their lovers and their pain, and for those few hours, I am distracted from my own. I do not know how knowing these things can help you in your new life. Perhaps, knowing I love you brings you some sort of peace, me I have not slept since September.
